What are you supposed to talk about?... Whether it's your first date or your 50th, sometimes coming up with interesting topics of conversation can be a challenge.
There are so many things you want to know about the person sitting across from you. Here are 10 questions sure to spark good conversation while letting you find out more about your potential love interest.
If you don't already know what your would-be partner does for a living, it's probably one of the first things you're interested in finding out. After all, a person's job says a lot -- is he financially stable? Is she creative or structured? Does your date even have a job? But rather than just simply asking where your companion spends the largest part of the day, why not dig a little deeper? Asking about a job's best aspects sets a positive tone and steers the career question away from negativity and spontaneous ranting about a horrible boss.
A person's taste in music reveals a lot about personality. Does your date like the twang of country, the steady rhythm of drum and bass or a jam-band bootleg ? But instead of just asking what music your date enjoys, evoke decision-making skills by narrowing it down to a personal top five. Sure, you may like the latest pop diva now, but would you tire of her crooning if you had to hear her all the time?
According to a study by psychologists, your music choices reveal a lot about your personality -- more so than the way you dress, your political views or even the movies you like. In fact, after listening to a compilation of songs chosen by a single person, people can make a fairly accurate assessment of major personality traits, like whether you're an introvert or an extrovert. Plus, maybe she'll be really into that obscure band you love that you thought nobody else had ever heard of.
Some movies are just as good the 30th time as they were the first, so what flick captures your date's attention time and time again? Asking about film faves is always a great conversation starter. And even though movie choices don't tell you as much about someone's personality as their music choices, everyone loves talking about their favorite flicks. If this question sparks your date's interest, you could even take it further -- what is the scariest movie you've ever seen? What was the funniest?
And don't forget the biggest benefit of this line of questioning: It could lead to the suggestion of seeing a movie for your next date.
What is the weirdest thing about you? Does she have a weird habit that you never would have guessed? What about a secret talent that makes him unique? This question can be exciting because it's likely neither of you will be sure just how much to reveal. So have fun with it (without freaking your date out too much).
But remember -- while this can be a fun question to make your date squirm, be prepared for the question to be thrown right back at you!
If you had the opportunity to spend a week anywhere in the world, where would you go?
This question is great for finding out about your date's sense of adventure. Is her dream vacation a relaxing week on the beach in Pwani ? Or has she always wanted to freeze her fingers off at an ice hotel? What about mountain climbing on mount Kenya?
Whether your date tells you she'd like to travel to the other side of the globe or that she'd jump at the chance to spend some time in her childhood home town, this question sets the conversation rolling about travels made, travels planned and travels only dreamed about. Maybe your jet-setting ambitions will coincide, but even if they don't, it's definitely one way to find out your date's idea of a good time.
Are you the oldest, the youngest or a middle child? Here's one way to bring up the topic of family without sounding like you're overly eager to become part of it. Studies show that birth order plays a role in personality development. Is he a competitive first born, an intense second born, a sympathetic third born or an emotional only child? Even though the basic characteristics can vary from person to person, and no two people are the same, finding out his role in his family can give you insight into his personality and character. It's also a good way to get a feel for his relationship with his family without the risk of dredging up potentially negative feelings.
Favorite food? Food is generally a safe topic because it's something most people enjoy. Pretty much everyone could name a favorite food or two, and it's a fun way to gauge how adventurous of an eater your date is. From there you can even ask if he likes to cook or what his favorite meal to make is. Is he a culinary genius or a macaroni and cheese kind of guy? Does she like to have big family meals, or does she prefer to order a pizza? Don't forget your companion's answers to these question -- it could be instrumental in deciding where to go on your next date.
Can I see you again? Don't forget to end a great date by making plans for another one! Whether you call her up a few days later, send an e-mail when you get home or ask her on the spot, don't forget to make it known that you'd love for there to be a future meeting. Be sure your date knows you've enjoyed her company and she'll leave feeling good about it. Life's too short for games, so if you had fun and would like to do it again sometime, just ask!
...I'm out
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