While I'm not one to advocate many personal development hacks, there is one "hack" that I think everyone should use: have high standards for yourself. Having high personal standards will almost immediately force personal growth, and will help you live up to your potential day after day.
Successful businesses, and for that matter successful people, succeed because they set high standards for themselves. If your standards are set to accept an average life, average is the best you can hope for.
It seems like every single wildly successful transformational / motivational/spiritual speaker/author I've ever encountered has a story to tell about the awful time in their lives when they were homeless, sleeping in an alley/bus-stop/car. They were drunk, disorderly, abused and rejected, or sober but fat, sick and utterly despondent.
They describe this moment as a time when their lives were so broken, there genuinely appeared no farther to fall. The next stop on their journey into the dark abyss was surely death … in fact, in their stories, something always does seem to die in their car, on the doorsteps of the homes they were just evicted from: their former selves who embraced extremely low standards – or no standards – for their lives. That low-standard self has to die in the fire of transformation so a new self can be born, one with the fierce determination to say, “No more! My life is bullsh*t! I now insist on entirely new standards for myself!”
Fortunately, you don’t have to be homeless to experience authentic transformation. You don’t have to lose your family and sleep in the bus station to get that the life you've been living isn't working and begin creating real change. You might have to experience being destitute in spirit, however, in the sense that you've finally and completely lost all hope that your current life strategies will ever work to make you authentically happy.
It's also really simple to execute.
Set high standards, ruthlessly pursue your goals, and respect yourself.
Your personal standards are also reflected in the promises you keep, in the way you dress and manage your life, finances and environment. They are also reflected in the quality of your work, values and communication. In fact, everything you do and say gives others an indication of the personal standards you live by.
It is said that first impressions count. Well, within 30 seconds of meeting someone they will look at the way you dress, listen to the way you communicate, and tune-in to other signals that subconsciously provide them with an indication of the types of standards you uphold. If they sense that you live with low standards, then they will judge you accordingly. On the other hand if they sense that you hold high standards, then you are more likely to win their respect and admiration in those 30 seconds.
Because your personal standards are reflected in so many areas of your life and in so many different ways, they are therefore always ‘on show’ for other people. You are therefore always sending messages about how you feel about yourself, about others, and about your life, whether you’re consciously aware of it or not. You are also always being judged by other people based on those messages.
In order to achieve a goal you need to live your life a certain way. You may for instance need to discipline yourself to keep your environment in order; to improve the quality of your work; to eat healthier meals; to curb your spending habits, etc. Every goal you set requires something from you. No matter what that is you must meet these requirements in order to have this goal in your life. The requirements must be met in the form of the personal standards you keep and live by.
If you feel that your personal standards are not at a level they should be to achieve your goals, then you will find the following process of some value. This five step process will help raise your personal standards.
1. Gain Clarity
Your first step is to clarify what it is exactly you want to achieve. It’s after all impossible to set standards if you don’t know what it is you want. Ask yourself:
2. Analyze Your Reality
Your second step is to analyze your current and desired reality. Your current reality is the life you are living at this very moment. Consider what kind of life this really is and the types of behaviors that define your actions and results in the present moment. Ask yourself:
What standards do I currently live by?
What standards do I have for myself in various situations?
What standards do I have for the roles I play in my life?
Within every role you partake in there will be a set of standards that you will uphold and a set of expectations that you will have of yourself and of others. Consider this for a moment, and then ask yourself:
Are these standards mine?
Are my current standards preventing me from doing my very best in these areas of my life?
Consider your goals and the roles you play. Now honestly ask yourself whether or not you are doing your very best in all these areas of your life. If the answer is “yes” then there really isn't much that you can change by yourself. However, you may want to gain more knowledge or simply ask for help in areas of your life where you are struggling most.
3. Find Inspiring Mentors
Your next step is to find appropriate mentors. These will be people who are currently living to the highest of standards in specific life areas that you are wanting to focus on. The purpose here is to use them as inspiration to help you raise your own personal standards.
Go out there and find mentors for each and every area of your life where you seek improvement and growth. Your mentors will provide you with the insights you’re looking for to help you achieve your goals.
4. Set Clear Standards
In other words, you must identify a set of standards you will follow. These standards effectively become the rules you live by.
5. Utilize the Pain and Pleasure Principle
The final step of this process is to utilize the pain and pleasure principle to help instill the motivation you need to follow through with these rituals, and subsequently live your life in accordance with your higher personal standards.
At times things might just be progressing a little too slowly for your liking. You've raised your standards; however they are just not high enough to make a significant difference to your life. In such instances, take a chance on yourself and shoot for the stars.
Comparing your personal standards with other people’s standards is a dangerous game. Remember that most people have very low standards and expectations of themselves, and that is why most people live a mediocre existence. Comparing yourself with the way they live their life; with their standards; with their norms, is often not going to get you to your desired destination.
Society as a whole is the domain of the masses. And the masses lead an average existence. If you have higher aspirations for yourself, then you cannot compare yourself to the masses. You must instead look at ways you can separate yourself from the masses. However, having said that, making comparisons with others is rarely helpful.
Instead of comparing yourself with others, compare yourself with your personal best. The only comparisons you should be making is to past versions of yourself. When you consistently meet certain standards of performance, keep setting ever higher standards for yourself, so that you always have something to strive for that’s slightly out of your reach. like.. This may be surprising, but you can not do what you want to do and still be saved. God Himself has standards. Satans's goal is to make you feel like God's standards are impossible to keep. Romans12:2 Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God - what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.
Successful businesses, and for that matter successful people, succeed because they set high standards for themselves. If your standards are set to accept an average life, average is the best you can hope for.
It seems like every single wildly successful transformational / motivational/spiritual speaker/author I've ever encountered has a story to tell about the awful time in their lives when they were homeless, sleeping in an alley/bus-stop/car. They were drunk, disorderly, abused and rejected, or sober but fat, sick and utterly despondent.
They describe this moment as a time when their lives were so broken, there genuinely appeared no farther to fall. The next stop on their journey into the dark abyss was surely death … in fact, in their stories, something always does seem to die in their car, on the doorsteps of the homes they were just evicted from: their former selves who embraced extremely low standards – or no standards – for their lives. That low-standard self has to die in the fire of transformation so a new self can be born, one with the fierce determination to say, “No more! My life is bullsh*t! I now insist on entirely new standards for myself!”
Fortunately, you don’t have to be homeless to experience authentic transformation. You don’t have to lose your family and sleep in the bus station to get that the life you've been living isn't working and begin creating real change. You might have to experience being destitute in spirit, however, in the sense that you've finally and completely lost all hope that your current life strategies will ever work to make you authentically happy.
It's also really simple to execute.
- Be Ruthless With Yourself
- Develop High Standards
- Respect Yourself
Set high standards, ruthlessly pursue your goals, and respect yourself.
Your personal standards are also reflected in the promises you keep, in the way you dress and manage your life, finances and environment. They are also reflected in the quality of your work, values and communication. In fact, everything you do and say gives others an indication of the personal standards you live by.
It is said that first impressions count. Well, within 30 seconds of meeting someone they will look at the way you dress, listen to the way you communicate, and tune-in to other signals that subconsciously provide them with an indication of the types of standards you uphold. If they sense that you live with low standards, then they will judge you accordingly. On the other hand if they sense that you hold high standards, then you are more likely to win their respect and admiration in those 30 seconds.
Because your personal standards are reflected in so many areas of your life and in so many different ways, they are therefore always ‘on show’ for other people. You are therefore always sending messages about how you feel about yourself, about others, and about your life, whether you’re consciously aware of it or not. You are also always being judged by other people based on those messages.
In order to achieve a goal you need to live your life a certain way. You may for instance need to discipline yourself to keep your environment in order; to improve the quality of your work; to eat healthier meals; to curb your spending habits, etc. Every goal you set requires something from you. No matter what that is you must meet these requirements in order to have this goal in your life. The requirements must be met in the form of the personal standards you keep and live by.
If you feel that your personal standards are not at a level they should be to achieve your goals, then you will find the following process of some value. This five step process will help raise your personal standards.
1. Gain Clarity
Your first step is to clarify what it is exactly you want to achieve. It’s after all impossible to set standards if you don’t know what it is you want. Ask yourself:
2. Analyze Your Reality
Your second step is to analyze your current and desired reality. Your current reality is the life you are living at this very moment. Consider what kind of life this really is and the types of behaviors that define your actions and results in the present moment. Ask yourself:
What standards do I currently live by?
What standards do I have for myself in various situations?
What standards do I have for the roles I play in my life?
Within every role you partake in there will be a set of standards that you will uphold and a set of expectations that you will have of yourself and of others. Consider this for a moment, and then ask yourself:
Are these standards mine?
Are my current standards preventing me from doing my very best in these areas of my life?
Consider your goals and the roles you play. Now honestly ask yourself whether or not you are doing your very best in all these areas of your life. If the answer is “yes” then there really isn't much that you can change by yourself. However, you may want to gain more knowledge or simply ask for help in areas of your life where you are struggling most.
3. Find Inspiring Mentors
Your next step is to find appropriate mentors. These will be people who are currently living to the highest of standards in specific life areas that you are wanting to focus on. The purpose here is to use them as inspiration to help you raise your own personal standards.
Go out there and find mentors for each and every area of your life where you seek improvement and growth. Your mentors will provide you with the insights you’re looking for to help you achieve your goals.
4. Set Clear Standards
In other words, you must identify a set of standards you will follow. These standards effectively become the rules you live by.
5. Utilize the Pain and Pleasure Principle
The final step of this process is to utilize the pain and pleasure principle to help instill the motivation you need to follow through with these rituals, and subsequently live your life in accordance with your higher personal standards.
At times things might just be progressing a little too slowly for your liking. You've raised your standards; however they are just not high enough to make a significant difference to your life. In such instances, take a chance on yourself and shoot for the stars.
Comparing your personal standards with other people’s standards is a dangerous game. Remember that most people have very low standards and expectations of themselves, and that is why most people live a mediocre existence. Comparing yourself with the way they live their life; with their standards; with their norms, is often not going to get you to your desired destination.
Society as a whole is the domain of the masses. And the masses lead an average existence. If you have higher aspirations for yourself, then you cannot compare yourself to the masses. You must instead look at ways you can separate yourself from the masses. However, having said that, making comparisons with others is rarely helpful.
Instead of comparing yourself with others, compare yourself with your personal best. The only comparisons you should be making is to past versions of yourself. When you consistently meet certain standards of performance, keep setting ever higher standards for yourself, so that you always have something to strive for that’s slightly out of your reach. like.. This may be surprising, but you can not do what you want to do and still be saved. God Himself has standards. Satans's goal is to make you feel like God's standards are impossible to keep. Romans12:2 Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God - what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.
When you expect God to complete you and not man, you have higher standards and make better decisions.
...Enter no situation without a goal in mind.
Go get some standards.
I’m out
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